Berdine Hull, CARC
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I was one of ten children and thought I had a rather functional childhood for being in a family of that size. I would also learn in my late adolescence what it meant to become an adult in the real world.
My life took a turn at the age of nineteen, as I was now a single mother. I had to find ways to make things work so that my child would never go without, and one of those decisions involved going back to school to achieve my Associates degree and then enlisting into the military to provide a stable life.
Years later however, I would experience one of the most tragic losses that every parent fears, and that was the loss of my daughter and two grandchildren in a car accident. I now was alone and was having to experience firsthand the stages of grief, and the only life I had known from the age of 19 to 42. I am the only one of my siblings who has lost a child, let alone grandchildren.
This tragic experience however did not imprison me in an ongoing state of depression, as it would most. I took acceptance in what had happened to my daughter and granddaughters, and I did not let it stop me from continuing on with what life had to offer. In 2003, I got married for the first time and also was blessed to become a mother again of a little girl that I adopted from China. I was now an older parent, was married with a more stable life that I had a decade ago with my first daughter. I was ready to build with my second daughter a life that I wish could have given my first.
Unfortunately the marriage didn’t last and I was a single mom again. The marriage didn’t work out as my husband had previously been married to an alcoholic and therefore wasn’t able to be emotionally involved in the marriage. I married again later on, to a man with alcohol and drug issues. Again, the marriage didn’t work out.
I was introduced to the CARC program from an old friend, and soon learned more about myself. For instance, the "functional" childhood that I thought I had, as it turns out, wasn’t as normal as I'd thought. Instead, I learned that I was not intentionally neglected but, due to being 7th in the large family, all of my needs had not been met. Through the course, I also have learned more about the effects of alcoholism and drug abuse of which I'd had no previous knowledge since I didn't grown up in that immediate environment - but my father’s father was an alcoholic and my mother’s brother, also, so the intergenerational patterns and scars were there. Finally, I also learned why, to a certain extent, I get involved with men who also did not have their needs met, therefore, they can’t meet my needs.
I started out as a CARC student and now help survivors to reclaim their lives and guide other through the healing process. I offers both group and private Coaching Certification Classes.
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Coaching Certification Classes